Disclaimer/January 12, 2007

Here is a little... disclaimer, if you will:

I've kept some form of a journal/diary ever since I was in second grade. I have a collection of childhood diaries and composition notebooks that served as my young adolescent journals and every now and then, I'll flip through them to remember the good old days when I was innocent and naive. Sometimes I'll come across an entry that will make me scream "What was I thinking?!" and proceed to flush with embarassment at what a silly pre-pubescent girl I was back in the day, but then I remember that most young girls carry a mini tank of air alongside of their brains that causes them to act dorky in front of boys.

Anyway, a lot of the entries in my old journals are very angry. Having grown up within a very old-fashioned Cuban family, there was a lot that I was sheltered from for too long and there were a lot of things that I wasn't allowed to ask questions about. My journal became my best friend. I could tell it anything and although it could never give me vocal advice, I always felt better after I had vented within its pages. I vented about my anger and frustrations about boys and about my raging hormones that I didn't understand and couldn't ask about and how my parents were unfair and OH MY GOD, LIFE! I bitched about literally everything under the sun.

I was introduced to blogging some time in junior high when I stumbled onto Open Diary, I think it was. I used it for about a week and then got bored of it for some reason. In mid-2003 I stumbled upon Diaryland. That online diary was a ventfest. I used it to vent my anger about my job and my family's ignorance and my crappy relationship with an ex-boyfriend, and I loved the fact that other people could actually read it all. It made me feel like someone was actually listening for the first time. People started leaving me comments telling me how they could relate to certain things I was going through and it gave me a sense of relief that I was not alone. It was therapy. I kept it for a little over a year and then got rid of it after I realized how pretty much every entry was of me in "bitch mode." I didn't like how the blog portrayed me as a person. It made me seem like an ungrateful, whiny little brat who hated everything about life.

I've blogged since then on MySpace and I have a few readers who've subscribed to my blog there (which makes me happy), and I'm going to continue blogging because it makes me all gooey and warm inside. I've matured quite a bit since my last Diaryland fiasco and I realize that although I can whine and complain here and let you all cheer me on as I climb up to the podium to receive my Bitch-of-the-Year Award, I can't just vent. I have so many stories to tell and so much of my life to share with others through words and pictures and videos, and I can't accomplish that if all I ever do is bitch about life's "woe is me" moments.

So, in closing this little "disclaimer," I vow to share stories and photographs with you all and to make my blog a fun place to visit. I can't promise you'll never read an entry where my head is spinning and I'm spewing pea-green puke, but I will try my hardest to make every entry a worthwhile read. I will share the good times and the bad.

Thanks for stopping by.

Love,
Anais
a.k.a
Silly Cake

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